Friday, September 26, 2008


No, this is not a post about potpourri, it's a post about a few different things. LisaB left me a comment that she missed me, so I thought I would write a post.

I am so over the guy in the last post. He is the one with issues, not me. Anyway, he told me he still wants to see me casually (ya right), so that made me feel better. But I am moving on. I've gone on a few dates with some nice men, but no connection yet. I am still hopeful!

Today is my mother's 60th birthday and we have some relatives coming up to surprise her, this should be a very fun weekend. I can't wait to see them. Oh and they will be staying here with me, so I spent 5 hours cleaning my house today. What fun!

I do have some bad news. My beloved Smokey is not doing so well. I have watched him get worse over the last few months. The good news is that he is still happy, he eats, he plays and he is there to greet me at the door every night when I come home, he also walks me to the door every morning before I leave. He does have accidents, we have to go outside A LOT even in the middle of the night. It's tough. He strains hard to go to the bathroom.

The only options that I have left for him are to take him to an oncologist. However, I have decided that since he is 12 years old and has a heart murmur that I am just going to let him live out the rest of what time he has left happy. I'm afraid that if I put him through chemo it will make him sick and miserable and who knows if it will even work or will even prolong his life. This is one of the toughest decisions I have made, but I've decided that I love him too much to put him through hell for my own selfishness.

I will say though that it's really hard. I can't even bear the thought of not seeing his sweet little face everyday. It breaks my heart, but I feel deep down it's for the best not to put him through it.

Anyway, I have been reading all of your blogs and keeping up to date on your lives.